It was only a few years ago that Chimamanda Ngozie Adichie’s now globally recognized TED Talk ‘We Should All Be Feminists’ called for citizens around the world to understand the necessity and significance of feminism. However, while Chimamanda’s address was to the world, within Nigeria her speech was met with almost an indifference that illuminates the challenges of talking about feminism or issues affecting women in Nigeria. This may be odd to some, expecially considering some of the realities for women and young girls in Nigeria. Like Boko Haram’s crusade against women, and the continued kidnapping of women and girls throughout Northern Nigeria. Or the fact that Nigeria has some of the highest rates of FGM and child marriage in the world.
So when the Warmate Book Club, decided to create a hashtag #BeingFemaleinNigeria (or alternatively #BeingAWomaninNigeria) to share their first hand stories of sexism in Nigeria- it was somehow surprising yet also welcome, when thousands of women joined in on the conversation. Now over 20,000 tweets later, it’s encouraging yet depressing to hear the tales of what it means to be a woman in Nigeria.
When she gets raped| why did you dress like that? When she gets beaten by her husband? | What did you do to him? #BeingFemaleInNigeria
— JJ. Omojuwa (@Omojuwa) June 30, 2015
What Nigerian women face before and during marriage:
#BeingFemaleInNigeria If you get pregnant before marriage, you’re useless. If you don’t get pregnant after marriage, you’re useless. — Bunny (@_Alphawoman) June 30, 2015
#BeingFemaleInNigeria Nigerian parents don’t expect you to date but expect you to be married at 25.
— Chukwuebuka Akara (@ebuka_akara) June 30, 2015
#BeingFemaleInNigeria your husband slapped you? Sorry. What did you say to make him angry? Go and beg. — Strokahuntas (@sassylabelle) June 30, 2015
Just how many different ways women’s rights are violated:
1. On a more serious note, #BeingFemaleInNigeria means that as a rural woman you are not likely to have the title deeds for land. — Onye Nkuzi (@cchukudebelu) June 30, 2015
My grandmother had to sleep with her husband’s corpse for three days to prove she didn’t kill him #BeingFemaleInNigeria — frida kahlo. (@LexiLoves__) June 30, 2015
Having to bear the Trauma of your rape alone because your rapist is a highly respected family member #BeingFemaleInNigeria — Nigerian God (@Echecrates) June 30, 2015 Other criticisms Nigerian women face:
#beingfemaleinnigeria is getting harassed in the market for wearing shorts in a country where the weather hits 40degrees on an average day — u.u (@KhaleesiNU) June 30, 2015
#beingfemaleinnigeria you must be a ‘hoe’ if you’re single & live in the same city with your parents but have your own apartment. — stefanie williams (@stephany_06) June 30, 2015
Then of course, there’s the man who felt the need to tell women to simmer down:
@onyi_okechukwu @kemiagas @elnathan gloom is not the only reality for women in Nigeria. — KoloKK | #SocialGood (@KoloKennethK) July 1, 2015
But he was appropriately silenced, albeit by another man:
Kolo. You are a man. Allow women to tell their story. Keep quiet and listen. This is the patriarchy we are fighting. https://t.co/MTd7BYh2Yt — Elnathan John (@elnathan) July 1, 2015